Videos
Hello and welcome to my video page. This page is a collection of videos I created or clips from my seminars. I often address treatment issues and concerns related to personality disorders, which include Borderline Personality Disorder, Narcissistic Personality Disorder, and others. If there is ever a topic you'd like me to address in a video just send me a request via the email link below.
Click the button below to be taken to my YouTube channel and subscribe, so you can see my most up-to-date videos.
I made a short video about my BPD Workbook, aptly titled: The Borderline Personality Disorder Workbook. Available here: https://lnkd.in/efk3dkX
Despite what you may have read or been told, BPD is not the worst thing that can happen to you. Like many mental health issues, it manifests on a spectrum, and while some people may encounter extreme symptoms and consequences on one end, others may be less affected on the other. What do you all have in common? You likely experience difficulty balancing your emotions, thoughts, and behaviors. And you may even have trouble seeing yourself clearly—continuously switching from the hero to the villain of the story you’ve written about your life. So, how can you make sense of it all and start on the road to healing?
I made a short video about my BPD Workbook, aptly titled: The Borderline Personality Disorder Workbook. Available here: https://lnkd.in/efk3dkX
Despite what you may have read or been told, BPD is not the worst thing that can happen to you. Like many mental health issues, it manifests on a spectrum, and while some people may encounter extreme symptoms and consequences on one end, others may be less affected on the other. What do you all have in common? You likely experience difficulty balancing your emotions, thoughts, and behaviors. And you may even have trouble seeing yourself clearly—continuously switching from the hero to the villain of the story you’ve written about your life. So, how can you make sense of it all and start on the road to healing?
Splitting is common in those with PDs, particularly those with NPD and BPD. Seeing people and situations as either black or white, or as all good or all bad is something that is also often applied to relationships. Many individuals along the NPD, BPD spectrum tend to see their relationships as all or nothing relationships, and this tends to cause significant difficulty in getting satisfaction out of those relationships, and it also increases the likelihood of relationship failure. In this video, we’re going to explore the all-or-nothing relationship.
This video is going to address issues that often arise when someone you love has BPD. There are things you can do to make their life, and yours easier. Are these magical tricks and tips, no. Are these things that will require you to do and think things differently about the person you love? YES.
Stress is on the rise. It has increased recently due to so many issues all around the world. We have an inherent tendency to be vigilant about things that can harm us, and we are constantly on the lookout for the next impending occurrence or massive shoe to drop. We need a break, we need a break from the drama and the trauma. However, these breaks are becoming fewer and farther apart. The internal and external response to the continuous influx of fear, pain, drama, and trauma of our world is what we call stress. In this video I am going to talk about this stress cycle and the signs, symptoms, and causes of it.
Emotional neglect is a form of abuse. Many individuals with BPD and BPD traits have experienced various forms of neglect while they were growing up, and well into their adulthood. This video is going to discuss neglect and how it plays into being a factor of BPD and how I work to lessen its negative impact of it with my clients.
In this video I am going to discuss what is called malignant narcissism, which is a combination of NPD, ASPD, sociopathy, and psychopathy. There is considerable evidence in research and clinical case studies that overlap exists between these personality types complicating the lives of those with these disorders, those who are in relationships with them, and those who work with them. Knowledge is key to identification, management, safety, and treatment and that’s what I’m here to provide.
In this video I discuss paranoia and the paranoid personality disorder (PPD) components of fear of being harmed, hurt, betrayed, disrespected, or abandoned and how they impact BPD. Paranoia has been found to be a prevalent aspect of BPD. PPD can co-occur in those with BPD. This video will examine this paranoia and PPD aspects, as it relates to BPD and how to manage it!
This video is going to help you help yourself or a loved one defuse and lessen the anxiety, anger, outburst and reactions associated with BPD episodes. Diffusing this situation is not a one and done deal, but something you can learn and do when needed.
It is hard for many people to forgive themselves, whether it is for transgressions that hurt others or hurt yourself. This video will discuss self-forgiveness and steps you can take to start healing. I also discuss the guilt, shame, doubt, and fear involved in this process. This is process that is challenging for many people, particularly those with a BPD.
Relationships are central to all of us, but particularly to those along the BPD spectrum. This video is going to discuss the favorite person relationship and some of the inherent challenges and fears as well as provide some suggestions to help you manage the relationship with your favorite person.
This video will cover the difference between BPD traits and BPD. I think this is important for people to know so they can build knowledge into themselves or their loved ones. There are 9 criteria and you must have 5 or more to qualify for the diagnosis. All 5 of these must be moderate, severe, or extreme in severity. If you only have 4 or less, that’s traits and not the disorder according to the criteria.
This video is going to discuss suicide, suicide prevention, and its impact on loved ones and those you know. Suicide and non-suicidal self-injury (NSSI) is a very serious and regretfully highly relevant topic and issue with those with BPD and with BPD traits.
It is very common for people with BPD, or those along the BPD spectrum, to catastrophize their view of self, others, their future, and especially their personality disorder. In this video we are going to discuss this very thing and some techniques to help you.
This video provides you with 7 strategies instead of engaging in those old maladaptive patterns that lead to problems in your life and relationships. You can do it differently!!
There is a misunderstood belief that women have BPD more often than men, old studies report about 76% female and 24% male, but these old studies are actually flawed due to sampling bias and other methodological errors. This error is even published in the DSM-5, the mental health diagnostic “bible”. More recent studies show no gender differences when controlled for these errors. This video is directed at clearing up this confusion to help you understand and recognize these differences.
This video is to try and clarify common misunderstandings and misconceptions of the efficacy and impact of medication on personality disorders, particularly antisocial, narcissistic, histrionic, and borderline personality disorders.
This video is not telling you how to manage your medication. Always consult your psychiatrist or medical provider for questions related to medications.
There is a strong tendency in those with BPD, and those along the BPD spectrum to self-sabotage just before a goal is reached, or when things are going well. This video discusses that tendency and what YOU can do about it.
One of the most challenging aspects of BPD, and other disorders, is obsessions. What is an obsession: an idea or thought that continually preoccupies or intrudes on a person's mind? This increases anxiety and drive for impulsive behavior to lessen the lessen the anxiety and discomfort. Obsessions covers a lot, so I thought I will discuss this in the context of OCPD and its connection to BPD and treatment options. You might be surprised what you learn, let’s check it out.
In this this video we examine the overlap between BPD and ADHD. This is a complicated combination that poses many challenges to not only the individuals who have these diagnoses but to the mental health practitioners who treat them.
Social media and internet addiction rate is estimated at approximately 1/3 of college aged users. What happens when we base who were are on likes, hearts, views, and other social media and internet rewards? Research shows that we become more unhappy and disillusioned with who we are and the world around us, but we also become addicted. In this video were going to talk about Social media and internet addiction and how it relates to personality.
How are you supposed to know what beating, or getting over, BPD looks like if you don't have a picture or idea of what it is? In mental health we don’t discuss what success looks like, but we should. We tend to discuss problems, harms, and hurts. There is benefit to knowing this, building insight and understanding, so you know what to look for as you grow and develop. However, it’s just as important to see and gain understanding into what it looks like when you’ve overcome your issues and beat BPD, as it is when your looking to identify it.
Fear is part of the change process, but it often prevents people form moving through the process and getting stuck in their old maladaptive patterns. It doesn't have to be this way!!
This video is going to discuss individuals who meet criteria for psychopathy, and particularly a subtype called successful psychopathy. This term is often misused colloquially referring to someone who commits a mean or very hateful act. When we talk about psychopathy in this video we are talking about people who have a long history of these acts and in many cases they’re extreme, but there are other factors to consider as well that we’ll discuss. We’re using the term clinically, not colloquially in this video.
Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) is on a spectrum and the degree of impaired functioning and impact on self and others is commensurate with that level of severity. In this video I’m going to discuss the 3 severity levels and the obstacles to overcoming NPD.
The things that drive you to engage in your beliefs, behaviors, and patterns are what makes up your core content and we’re going to identify it for you today in this video, and discuss what make it so hard to get to and change.
What thoughts, feelings, and memories impact you most? Which of these tend to drive you engage in your unhealthy beliefs, behaviors and patterns that’re causing you to hurt yourself, your relationships, and disrupting your personal and work life?
Defense Mechanism Worksheet: https://www.drdfox.com/worksheets
BPD tends to cause folks to see the world in distorted ways. All PDs are developmental in many ways, and as individuals learn to cope with PD symptoms they develop maladaptive strategies and many of those strategies are to compensate for a distorted view of the world. This is seeing the world through what I call the BPD Lens. In this video, we are going to discuss the BPD Lens and then how to challenge it.
This video is going to cover the high-risk situations for individuals with BPD and BPD traits. These high-risk situations include interpersonal situations, negative emotions, life events, cognitive distress, and cue and urges. Learning about these high-risk situations may help you build your awareness and insight into each of these and help you to find alternative behaviors to help manage them better.
In this video we’ll discuss the change process. Let’s think for a moment, what in our world does not change? Ducks, rocks, chemicals, plastic, etc. it all changes for different reasons and response to different internal and external conditions. Change is unique for each of us, but it also follows a series of somewhat universal stages, including precontemplation, contemplation, preparation, action, maintenance, and relapse. Let’s talk about these stages now.
We’re going to revisit BPD subtypes in this video and clarify some questions from the first one. A subtype is a different presentation or form of an idea or concept. For our purposes, “borderline personality disorder” is the general term we use for this disorder, and the subtypes are the specific presentations, or forms, of BPD.
Depression, specifically MDD is seen in 83% of those with BPD
There is significant symptoms overlap:
There is significant symptoms overlap:
• Sullen presentation mimics depressive symptoms
• Suicide risk and self-harm
• Affective instability = Intense episodic dysphoria; Frequent temper outbursts, agitation, irritability mimic agitated depression
• Feelings of emptiness
• Stress-related paranoia severe dissociative symptoms mimic depression with psychotic features.
• Suicide risk and self-harm
• Affective instability = Intense episodic dysphoria; Frequent temper outbursts, agitation, irritability mimic agitated depression
• Feelings of emptiness
• Stress-related paranoia severe dissociative symptoms mimic depression with psychotic features.
Complicated grief (CG) is a prolonged, persistent, and intense grief response to a loss, usually loss of a beloved person. An individual with CG can't or doesn't adapt to the loss or integrate/accept the loss. This type of experience associated with loss is quite common for those with a PD, particularly those with BPD.
I was assisted by a grief expert, a previous professor and mentor of mine, Dr. Sherry Cormier (her website: https://www.sherrycormierauthor.com/).
Many individuals carry the false belief that because “I feel it so strongly, it must be true”. This is actually a pattern of problematic thinking, called Emotional Reasoning. These feelings are so intense, you just know inside they’re true, but there is no evidence to show they’re true.
Due to these overwhelming, unverified emotions you engage, act, and react sabotaging relationships and yourself. In this video we will discuss the problematic thinking type called emotional reasoning to help you identify it, challenge it, and control it to produce the best possible outcomes for yourself.
This video discusses Self Harm and Borderline Personality Disorder to help you build your understanding so you can gain insight and control in self harm tendencies and behaviors. Self-mutilation is a complex byproduct of a wide variety of mental illnesses. It has been associated with substance abuse, eating disorders, posttraumatic stress disorder, major depressive disorder, anxiety disorders, schizophrenia, and BPD (Klonsky et al., 2003).
In this video we are going to explore your inner critic and I’ll give you some suggestions on how to lessen its impact and how to control it. The inner critic is that voice inside, sometimes little and sometimes huge (like in many of my clients). The voice is not psychotic, it is not part of a derealization, but an internal running dialogue of your failures, faults, problems, weaknesses, and supposed inherent defects. Unchecked your inner critic grows in power over years, but checked it can be lessened and controlled.
This video will focus on increasing your awareness when you encounter moments of emotional turmoil. We will identify and explore the very beginning of the emotional turmoil process, triggers/emotional buttons, the related sensations, thoughts, and feelings, and the surface structure behaviors you end up engaging in. Lastly, we will take a look at the outcome or consequences and then how to slow the process down and build skills to manage those moments before you feel like you’re drowning in emotions.
The final 3 interpersonal patterns covered in this video are:
4) Anxiety about autonomy /independence.
5) Dependent-depressive factor is when you have Feelings of depression conflicted with autonomy.
6) Successful interactions is the desire to not be irresponsible (i.e., to take one’s responsibilities), acceptance of others, and feelings of pride and confidence.
It is not uncommon for individuals with BPD to feel as though they need to be in a relationship to feel complete and whole, and to exist. Learning about this tendency for dependency and the related patterns can help you see yourself and your relationships differently. The goal of these videos is to help you re-conceptualize how you see yourself as a whole person, but also how you see who you are in your relationships. Wanting to be in a relationship is great, needing to be in one is frightening and triggering. Knowing your patterns and underlying forces can help you do your relationships differently, in an adaptive a healthy way.
Being diagnosed with BPD is a scary thing for many individuals, but for some it provides clarification and a framework to understand your thoughts, feelings, and actions about you and the world around you. This video is designed to help with the steps after you’ve found out you have been given a BPD diagnosis.
How accurately can you read someone’s mind by looking at their face and judging their body language? This video is going to talk about this very thing and how it relates to those with and without BPD.
The goal of this video is to help you identify how well you can or cannot determine someone thoughts, emotions, and intent based upon their facial expression and body language. We also have to be wary of cognitive distortions, and in this case we’re going to talk about the distortion of mindreading.
How can you be sad and mad at the same time? It’s called agitated depression or Major Depressive Disorder (MDD) with anxious distress. Depression is not just a sense of sadness and lack of motivation and feeling hopeless, helpless, and worthless. It can also include feeling anxious, tense, and keyed up. Understanding these difference can help you better understand yourself, your symptoms, and your BPD.
Approximately 78% of those with BPD also have a substance abuse disorder or addition some time in their life. Substance abuse significantly negatively impacts BPD symptoms and treatment.
Knowledge will help you understand and seek treatment to manage your substance abuse and BPD issues. These are both treatable issues, and the power of knowledge is the first step.
It is not uncommon for individuals with Borderline Personality Disorder to have comorbid/co-occurring substance abuse issues. In this video I discuss treatment tips and techniques to help you manage your addiction issues so you are better able to address those personality disorder or other issues that underlie the drive to use and abuse drugs and alcohol.
Covert narcissism can occur in anyone, that includes your parents, friends, coworkers, bosses, or significant others.
In this video I discuss the 4 components that make up covert narcissism to help you identify it in others, or perhaps in yourself; these include self-concept, interpersonal, social, and ethical aspects.
All people experience anger, but those with BPD and BPD traits have specific triggers that can set them off into an anger or rage episode. Knowing these triggers can help you learn to identify and control your anger and rage.
Anger or rage is likely to be seen from those with BPD when they feel like a failure, feel neglected, alone, rejected, or abandoned. Once triggered, the individual with BPD tends to wonder whether the caregiver, or love object or favorite person, cares and gives enough.
We all experience anger but do we all understand it? Learning more about your anger can help you recognize and control it. I will tell you about an anger questionnaire I created to help you at the end, as well provide a link to another video on anger reduction techniques.
Link to Anger Questionnaire: https://www.drdfox.com/worksheets
We all experience anger and feel controlled by it, but we don’t have to and this video is going to help you reduce your anger and help you empower yourself through greater personal control. Learning to control and manage your anger will empower you with choice that your anger takes away.
What is anger? Anger is a feeling, or a cluster of feelings, but how you use it, understand it, and act on it is up to you – even when it feels like you have no choice, you do. Check out the 7 anger types to learn to identify it (https://youtu.be/JucB-FwvoFg).
The International Classification of Sleep Disorders distinguishes more than 80 different disorders, which can be effectively treated. Problems with falling asleep or daytime sleepiness affect approximately 35 to 40% of the U.S. adult population. Individuals with BPD experience significantly greater instances of nightmares, increased levels of dream anxiety, and disturbed sleep.
In this video I examine the overlap between agoraphobia and Borderline Personality Disorder. Research shows that 74.2% of individuals with BPD have a co-occurring anxiety disorder. You'll be surprised how many criteria for agoraphobia overlap with issues and concern individuals with BPD also have.
The ACE technique is a method to help manage and overcome anxiety. ACE = Accept, Challenge, and Evaluate anxiety that is holding you back and preventing you from moving forward in your life and relationships.
I was interviewed on What is BPD? by host Rayah Dickerson from Depth of Echoes podcast. She was kind enough to let me record the interview. I am aware that my side is a bit dark and I apologize in advance for this. YouTube and the video recording process is still a learning process for me.
This video is aimed at Debunking The Myths & Misunderstandings of Borderline Personality Disorder. The goal is to help educate not only those who may be experiencing BPD, and BPD traits, but those loved ones who are trying to understand what someone with BPD, or BPD traits, is going through and the treatment prognosis.
This video explores Bipolar Disorder and Borderline Personality Disorder symptoms and is designed to lessening the confusion. It is my hope that this video clears up some of this confusion.
This video is about boundaries and Borderline Personality Disorder - BPD. In this video I discuss how boundaries help us feel safe and understand our environment. The difference between healthy and unhealthy boundaries. I also go over the four types of boundaries: Solid, Broken, Loose, and Adaptable. Knowing what type of boundary is present and how to move from a maladaptive boundary to an adaptive boundary will be covered to help empower you with choice and knowledge about what boundary or boundaries you have.
This is a complex issue, depression in those with BPD (borderline personality disorder). Depression is seen in 83% of those with BPD.
There is significant symptoms overlap between depressive symptoms and BPD:
• Sullen presentation mimics depressive symptoms
• Suicide risk and self-harm
• Affective instability = Intense episodic dysphoria; Frequent temper outbursts, agitation, irritability mimic agitated depression
• Feelings of emptiness
• Stress-related paranoia severe dissociative symptoms mimic depression with psychotic features.
In this video I discuss how jealousy and envy relate to the expression of borderline personality disorder traits and components.
Which do you think is more impactful for those with BPD?
Envy is a two-person situation whereas jealousy is a three-person situation. Envy is a reaction to lacking something. Jealousy is a reaction to the threat of losing something (usually someone).
Although Borderline and Narcissistic Personality Disorder are similar in many ways, they are different as well. Accurate diagnosis and understanding these two disorders can lead to better self-understanding and treatment outcomes.
In this video I answer 3 questions from people who have subscribed to my website asking about issues related to personality disorders.
The purpose of this video is to provide answers and suggestions to individuals with traits or a personality disorder, or to help a loved one with traits or a personality disorder.
This video will cover:
1. How to find a therapist
2. Questions to ask him/her (or you may be able to find this on his/her website)
3. Questions to ask yourself after meeting with him/her
4. Ways to know if therapy is working
5. Does therapy really work?
It is my sincere hope that this video is helpful for you to find someone who can help you move forward with strength, empowerment, resiliency, insight, and self-understanding.
This video examines the similarities and differences between Complex PTSD and Borderline Personality Disorder. Most traumatic events (e.g., car accidents, natural disasters, etc.) are of time-limited duration. However, some people experience continuous trauma that repeats for months or years. Individuals who experience chronic trauma often report additional symptoms in addition to formal PTSD symptoms, such as changes in their self-concept and the way they adapt to stressful events. These issues often mimic features or criteria associated with BPD.
In this video I answer 3 questions from people who have subscribed to my website asking about issues related to personality disorders.
The purpose of this video is to provide answers and suggestions to individuals with traits or a personality disorder, or to help a loved one with traits or a personality disorder.
In this video we will discuss the difference between the two types of shame: "traditional" shame and Toxic Shame and how they relate to borderline personality disorder. We also examine the impact, origin, and how to reduce and heal from Toxic Shame.
Broken heart syndrome is a recognized medical condition also known as stress-induced cardiomyopathy. The symptoms of broken heart syndrome are similar to those of a heart attack, but they are not caused by blocked arteries. Instead, the condition is believed to be caused by a surge of stress hormones, including adrenaline and cortisol, which narrows the arteries and temporarily limits blood flow to the heart. This can also lead to an irregular heartbeat and, in rare cases, sudden death.
Many individuals with BPD feel uncertain about where they end and others begin. This is part of the unstable self-image often seen in those with this diagnosis. This video will discuss identity disturbance in BPD and the feeling that you have no idea who you are or what you believe in, characterized by shifting goals, values, and vocational aspirations. There may be sudden changes in opinions and plans about career, sexual identity, values, and types of friends.
Have you ever been in a relationship with a narcissist? Did you feel like you were going through a cyclical pattern that kept you stuck?
This video discusses how to identify and work through the three parts or phases of the narcissistic relationship cycle, the Glorifying, Belittling, and Abandoning phases and how to identify and work through each.
This video will discuss helpful tips and strategies for those parents, partners, or children who have loved ones with Borderline Personality Disorder, or BPD traits. I also discuss the family system and the challenge people have trying to breakout of that family role due to the system that is usually in place. I have created a worksheet for you as well, here's the link: http://www.drdfox.com/worksheets
We’ve all had experiences where we’ve been set off, but it’s what you do after that is so critical. This video examines the 2 types of triggers: standard triggers and emotional buttons and I discuss the differences and the impact each has on how you respond when they occur.
Manage triggers/emotional buttons:
1. Identify your standard triggers & emotional buttons
2. Recognize the difference in how they feel & impact your thoughts, feelings & memories.
3. Plan out how you are going to respond in an adaptive & healthy manner when you become activated by a person or event
4. Play this plan out in your mind over & over again, practice it
5. Have some positive coping strategies you can access, such as mindfulness, strategic healthy distraction, yoga, etc.
6. The more you practice this, the more you will maintain your control.
In this video I discuss the proposed origins of each of the 4 Borderline Personality Disorder subtypes: Impulsive, Petulant, Self-Destructive, and Discouraged (Quiet). These origins are proposed and researched by T. Millon (2004).
In this video, I explore what makes narcissism so difficult in their own lives, their partners lives, and their children's lives. This video will examine narcissism from 3 aspects (listed below) and then discuss the technique I use when working with individuals (and/or their partners) along the narcissistic spectrum.
The 3 aspects include:
1. Impaired insight
2. Developing a reinforcing interpersonal circle
3. Reluctance to engage in adaptive and healthy new behaviors.
This video will discuss and provide management techniques to help those diagnosed with borderline personality disorder (BPD) identify and manage intense relationships.
Are you the partner of a narcissist or someone along the narcissistic spectrum?
Perhaps you're a mental health provider working with the partner of a narcissist or someone along the narcissistic spectrum. This video is design to help you identify the initial steps to starting treatment and areas of consideration to move forward and plan a trajectory of success. You do have choices and you can build the insight to DO IT DIFFERENTLY!!
Splitting is a tendency to alternate between extremes of idealization and devaluation. This video is aimed at defining splitting often seen in individuals with borderline personality disorder and how to manage it.
This video will cover possible outcomes from splitting and a technique to help you manage it to gain control and empower yourself to continue to grow beyond your BPD.
This video aims to clear up the confusion related to identifying and dealing with individuals with narcissistic traits and narcissistic personality disorder.
The video provides an explanation of each criteria related to NPD , impaired insight, the root of narcissism, associated features, and what makes working with and dealing with those with narcissistic traits or narcissistic personality disorder so difficult.